Oh, Canada...

Tomorrow is Canada Day, a time for all Canadians (yes, even you, Quebec) to celebrate this big, goofy country of ours.

Our big, goofy flag.

I do not fit the mold of the stereotypical Canadian. While I do apologize when I feel an apology is warranted, I’m just as likely to tell the offended party to go f**k themselves. I never say “aboot,” and I don’t end every sentence with “eh.” I don’t drink Molson beer. If given a choice between a Molson and a random urine sample, I’d choose the Molson, but after a few sips I’d think I made the wrong choice. I don’t listen to Rush. Ever! I’d rather listen to The Singing Butts “Unplugged” than suffer through that goddamn tree song of theirs.  (Dare to compare: The Singing Butts vs. That God-Awful Tree Song. ) And lastly, I don't like hockey - at all! Of everything on this list this seems to be the most surprising to my fellow Canucks. But make no mistake, I am fiercely proud to be a Canadian. And so, in celebration of Canada's special day, here are a couple of Canadian cartoons. As usual, click the image for a larger view.  

Oddly enough, that second cartoon actually managed to offend a fellow Canadian, who expressed his outrage over a moose-riding beaver in a mountie hat. So be warned, my American friends, you can joke about our manner of speech, and you can laugh at our polite demeanor, but don’t mess with our beavers or you’re in for a good old fashion tongue lashing! (Okay, that sounds a lot dirtier than I intended.)

Enjoy the weekend, everyone!

Can't see the forest for the condos.

Okay, let’s start things off with a pool update. As predicted the water is now crystal clear and the giant water-breathing spider has been vanquished (and, no, that wasn’t a girlish scream you heard when I scooped in out of the water, it was a warrior’s cry of triumph).

With that out of the way, let’s move on to today’s topic: trees, and the people that love them (namely my wife, Christine). 

When we first moved to the city of Saint-Hubert there were still a lot of forested areas nearby, but over the years most have disappeared in the name of condo development. Recently I suggested planting a tree in front of our living room window to help block the afternoon sun (being a hater of all things bright and beautiful). Chris agreed, but decided we should rescue the trees from an area marked for development instead of buying them from a nursery like normal people. And so we packed a bunch of gardening tools in the car and headed off like a couple of half-assed eco-warriors to a local forest. We located two trees that seemed small enough to handle and went to work, all the time fighting an onslaught of biting insects hell bent on draining every last drop of blood from our bodies. It was tough going, but we persevered and soon we were happily heading home with two trees hanging out the back of our Hyundai Accent. We prepared a couple of holes, planted our new woody friends, then headed inside to toot our own self-righteous horns on Facebook.

Nature shall sing my praises!

Unfortunately this story doesn’t have a happy ending. Alas, our trees have gone to that big orchard in the sky. Their dried husks now lay in my driveway, a sad reminder of our failure. Our goal was to save a couple of trees from condo developers, but only succeeded in robbing these saplings of the time that remained to them before the bulldozers plowed them under, and that’s a shame we must live with, at least until garbage day.   

The outcome of our folly!

Which brings us to today’s cartoons, all of which revolve around – you guessed it – trees! As always, click the cartoon for a larger image.

Well, that does it for this post. If you’re interested in more tree related cartoons check out my weekly panel at BigGameHunt.net .

Later, people!