The Shameless Self Promotion Post

I've never been comfortable with the self promotion side of cartooning. It would be nice just to throw stuff out into the marketplace and let people discover it on their own, but as a business model that kind of sucks. So, with Christmas fast approaching, I thought I’d take this opportunity to plug a few products from my Cafepress and Zazzle stores.

For anyone who enjoys my hunting cartoons at BigGameHunt.net my 2014 Hunting Cartoon Calendar is now available at Cafepress, and for the first time I’m offering two versions. The Vertical Wall Calendar features 13 (counting the cover) full colour cartoons. Or, if you prefer, you can purchase the more affordable one page Calendar Print featuring a six full colour cartoon illustration.

You can find the calendars at the following links: Vertical Wall Calendar  or

Calendar Print . Oh, and for some strange reason Cafepress now offers the option of changing the year, so be sure to chose 2014 when ordering.     

The same Cafepress store also features other gift ideas, including mugs, travel mugs, and Christmas tree ornaments featuring my Blame It On Peta Christmas cartoon. 

To see all available products visit my store by clicking here.

(The Blame It On Peta cartoon is also available as a Christmas card from Noble Works Inc. and can be found by clicking here or click this link  to find all of my Noble Works cards.) 

I also have two stores at Zazzle which feature plenty of gift ideas:

Fortune St. Cartoons and my new shop The Hunter's Horn Gift Shop, which, as you may have guessed, contains products featuring my hunting cartoons, including Christmas cards, mugs, and ornaments for your tree. The great thing about Zazzle is that the products can be customized, so please stop by and see what's available.

And that's about it. Self promotion done!

Til next time...

I know, I know – it’s been another massive gap between blog posts. What can I say? I’m a shitty blogger.

I ran across an essay by Tim Kreider in the New York Times Sunday Review

that would be of interest to anyone trying to eke out a living as a cartoonist, illustrator, or writer. What I would love is for anyone hoping to employ the services of an artist to read it, but I doubt many will. Here’s a link to the piece:

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/27/opinion/sunday/slaves-of-the-internet-unite.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

Anyway, seeing as we’re so close to Halloween I thought I’d post a few ghoulish cartoons to put everyone in the mood. As always click the image for a larger view.

Enjoy!

Have a happy and safe Halloween everybody!

Painting the house and dogs, just because.

Yes, I know, another long stretch between blog posts. What can I say? I’ve been occupied with other things. For example, we just started painting our house. What makes this chore particularly annoying is that my wife does it while wearing her regular clothes. She never gets so much as a drop on herself. Meanwhile, ten seconds after opening the can I look like I was in an explosion at a paint factory.

Anyway, the only cartoon I have that deals with house painting is this oldie:

Again, what can I say? I hate painting and don’t really think about it all that much. But I do love dogs, so I have a whole bunch of dog cartoons. As usual, click the image for a larger view.  Enjoy!

You can't tell, but I'm mooning my computer screen.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, people - it’s NUDE RECREATION WEEK! Time to head out to your neighbourhood  park and air out your naughty bits!

In celebration of this week of full frontal fun I bring you a selection of cartoons featuring – you guessed it – nudity! Nothing graphic or particularly dirty in nature, but there are butts and boobs and nipples and knobs on display, so if you are easily offended perhaps you should go elsewhere.

As always, click the images for a larger view.

This next one is an oldie. It was quite popular in its day and was actually published as a greeting card by two different companies.  I guess nothing says “happy holidays” like a good dick joke.

These next two cartoons feature mom boobs, or at least they would if I hadn't concealed them behind their mom arms.

And on that note I wish you all a very pleasant Nude Recreation Week. 

Enjoy!

Oh, Canada...

Tomorrow is Canada Day, a time for all Canadians (yes, even you, Quebec) to celebrate this big, goofy country of ours.

Our big, goofy flag.

I do not fit the mold of the stereotypical Canadian. While I do apologize when I feel an apology is warranted, I’m just as likely to tell the offended party to go f**k themselves. I never say “aboot,” and I don’t end every sentence with “eh.” I don’t drink Molson beer. If given a choice between a Molson and a random urine sample, I’d choose the Molson, but after a few sips I’d think I made the wrong choice. I don’t listen to Rush. Ever! I’d rather listen to The Singing Butts “Unplugged” than suffer through that goddamn tree song of theirs.  (Dare to compare: The Singing Butts vs. That God-Awful Tree Song. ) And lastly, I don't like hockey - at all! Of everything on this list this seems to be the most surprising to my fellow Canucks. But make no mistake, I am fiercely proud to be a Canadian. And so, in celebration of Canada's special day, here are a couple of Canadian cartoons. As usual, click the image for a larger view.  

Oddly enough, that second cartoon actually managed to offend a fellow Canadian, who expressed his outrage over a moose-riding beaver in a mountie hat. So be warned, my American friends, you can joke about our manner of speech, and you can laugh at our polite demeanor, but don’t mess with our beavers or you’re in for a good old fashion tongue lashing! (Okay, that sounds a lot dirtier than I intended.)

Enjoy the weekend, everyone!

Can't see the forest for the condos.

Okay, let’s start things off with a pool update. As predicted the water is now crystal clear and the giant water-breathing spider has been vanquished (and, no, that wasn’t a girlish scream you heard when I scooped in out of the water, it was a warrior’s cry of triumph).

With that out of the way, let’s move on to today’s topic: trees, and the people that love them (namely my wife, Christine). 

When we first moved to the city of Saint-Hubert there were still a lot of forested areas nearby, but over the years most have disappeared in the name of condo development. Recently I suggested planting a tree in front of our living room window to help block the afternoon sun (being a hater of all things bright and beautiful). Chris agreed, but decided we should rescue the trees from an area marked for development instead of buying them from a nursery like normal people. And so we packed a bunch of gardening tools in the car and headed off like a couple of half-assed eco-warriors to a local forest. We located two trees that seemed small enough to handle and went to work, all the time fighting an onslaught of biting insects hell bent on draining every last drop of blood from our bodies. It was tough going, but we persevered and soon we were happily heading home with two trees hanging out the back of our Hyundai Accent. We prepared a couple of holes, planted our new woody friends, then headed inside to toot our own self-righteous horns on Facebook.

Nature shall sing my praises!

Unfortunately this story doesn’t have a happy ending. Alas, our trees have gone to that big orchard in the sky. Their dried husks now lay in my driveway, a sad reminder of our failure. Our goal was to save a couple of trees from condo developers, but only succeeded in robbing these saplings of the time that remained to them before the bulldozers plowed them under, and that’s a shame we must live with, at least until garbage day.   

The outcome of our folly!

Which brings us to today’s cartoons, all of which revolve around – you guessed it – trees! As always, click the cartoon for a larger image.

Well, that does it for this post. If you’re interested in more tree related cartoons check out my weekly panel at BigGameHunt.net .

Later, people!

Spring has sprung....

Hello...

Yes, I know, it's been a while since my last update. I have an excuse - it's spring, and that means getting the backyard ready for human habitation, which leaves little time for anything else. One chore that I've been avoiding is getting the pool water to a point where it won't overload a swimmer's immune system. 

So inviting!

Pictures don't do it justice. It actually has its own ecosystem populated by nightmare creatures such as this giant water breathing spider.

Holy shit!

But fear not, sometime in the next few days I will battle the plague of mosquitoes that is breeding on the surface of the stagnant pool water and hook up the filter system. It'll take a boat load of chemicals but eventually the water will be clear and sparkling and giant spider free! 

Anyway, like most disgusting, pestilent things in my life the state of my pool has inspired a cartoon, one which features my favorite monster from the old Universal horror films, the Creature from the Black Lagoon!

And because it's been so long between posts, here are two more cartoons featuring the creature.

The last cartoon even features a nod to the Gill Man's first love, the gorgeous Julia Adams. Say what you want about the creature, but he sure had great taste in women!

He was a player.

Well, that does it for now. I'll try and post more frequently in the future. 

Later, people!

Colouring Cartoons the Canadian Way!

Ha ha... okay, just kidding - there is no Canadian Way to colour cartoons... at least I don't think there is. If there was a Canadian Way it would probably involve drinking Molson Export, listening to Rush, and somehow working hockey into the mix. But here's the thing; I can't stand hockey, Molson beer gives me the shits, and as far as I'm concerning Rush is the musical equivalent of rubbing two chunks of styrofoam together, so Canadian Way be damned! 

Oh, and Blogger, c-o-l-o-u-r is the way colour is spelled in Canada, SO STOP PUTTING THAT SQUIGGLY RED LINE UNDERNEATH IT!

Anyway...

Back in February I ripped back the curtain and exposed the dynamic process of taking a cartoon idea from pencilled rough to finished line art . If you missed it click here. Seriously, you'll laugh, you'll cry - it'll change your life! 

Today I thought we could explore the steps I take to turn the plain, old line art into a colourful feast for your eyes through the magic of Photoshop!

I share this information at great personal risk! Cartoonists do not want you to know the secrets I'm about to reveal! Once this is posted I fully expect the Internet to be flooded with nasty caricatures of yours truly in sexually compromising  positions with various farm animals and (God help me) Michele Bachmann. But I won't be silenced! DO YOU HEAR ME, GEOFF HASSING! I WON'T BE SILENCED!!

Now I want to be clear about something - I am no master of Photoshop. When I first installed the program I asked advice from friends who were veteran users on the best way to add colour to a line drawing, and what I got back seemed overly complicated. I decided to play around with program's different settings until I found a simple way to achieve the effects I wanted, and that's what I'm passing on today. For all I know my techniques will horrify most Photoshop pros, or they might actually be the correct way of doing things. All I know is they work for me. If anyone has any tips or tricks for further simplifying the process, by all means share them in the comments.

And now on with the show...

First off, it is extremely rare that I work with more than one layer over the background line art. When adding the layer make sure the mode you choose is multiply.

If you leave the mode on normal the colour you add will cover the line art, but set to multiply it allows the line art to show through.

Again, this might not be the correct way to do things - I honestly don't know - but I prefer to clearly see my line art while adding colour.  DON'T JUDGE ME!

Now that I have my layer I can start adding the base colours. This actually is the longest part of the whole process because - fun fact - I'm partially colour blind. For example, I have a shirt that for years I thought was gray until my wife pointed out to me that it was actually dark green. For this reason I have a hard time choosing which colours look good together. 

Now, if you want to use the fill tool (and why the hell wouldn't you?) it's necessary to close any breaks in the line art, otherwise the colour will just seep out and fill most of the drawing. The illustration below shows the various line breaks in one section of the drawing.

Now I could easily close all these breaks while doing line corrections in Photoshop, and that would definitely make it easier to use the fill tool, but these breaks give character to the drawing and I prefer to preserve them. Once I've decided on, say, the colour of the chair I just zoom in on the breaks and close them off using that colour. Here's a close-up of the man's shirt with the breaks closed off with the shirt colour:

This sounds more time consuming than it actually is. 

When all is said an done you end up with this:

I like to think of this stage as the Plain Jane version of the finished art, mostly because the term is pretty sexist and I'm all about stirring up controversy. To be honest you could stop right here and call it a day, but I prefer to give the drawing a little more oomph! (And, yes, oomph is the technical term for it.) At this stage I like to add shading using the air brush tool set on multiply. All you do is choose the area you want to shade using the wand tool and then work the section with the air brush tool using the same colour as the chosen area. Here's a side by side comparison of a section of the drawing before and after shading:

See? Oomph!

The sore spots and the black eye were made using the air brush tool set to normal.

In the end you end up with something like this:

So much oomph my oomph circuits are over-oomphing!

Note: to shade the wall and floor I first used the gradient tool, again set to multiply. I then added further shading around the chair and the man using the air brush tool.

All that's left to do is to  merge your single layer with the background line art, save the file as a tiff, or jpeg, or whatever floats yer boat, and you're done! Easy!

Well, I hope this was clear and informative. What it really comes down to is practice and trying new things. Photoshop is very forgiving and if something doesn't work out the way you want, just undo it and try again. If you have any questions drop me a line.

'Til net time.

Easter weekend

Okay, so apparently Easter Sunday is this weekend. I had no idea until my daughter pointed it out. I don’t know why, but Easter always seems to sneak up on me like this.

I would like to do a big Easter post, but the thing is I really don’t do Easter cartoons. In fact, the only two I could find were done for my hunting panel at BigGameHunt.net. I even went through all the roughs I have sitting around, and while I found cartoons for Christmas, Halloween, Valentine’s Day, Thanksgiving, and even Arbour Day, I found bugger all for Easter. Why I've neglected this particular holiday is beyond me, but I do intend to remedy the situation and start writing a bevy of Easter related material so that next year’s post will be nothing short of spectacular. In the meantime, please make do with the following gags.

And now, just to pad things out a bit, here's an egg related cartoon, and while it's not technically about Easter, there is that egg / Easter connection that kind of makes it relevant to this post. (Just work with me, people!)

Well, that's it - slim pickings I know. If you're hungry for more Easter humour check out these pictures of people traumatizing kids with their creepy Easter Bunny costumes.  

Enjoy your weekend, everybody!

Later.

Death and Taxes

Hey gang!

It’s everyone’s favourite time of the year – TAX TIME (or as I like to call it, The Yearly Curse-a-thon). Here in good ol’ Quebec we get to do a federal AND a provincial return, so it’s twice the fun!

Anyway, no use bellyaching. As the old saying goes, the only two certainties in life are death and taxes, and so with this in mind I've decided to post a bunch of death and taxes cartoons. As you’ll see, I have way more cartoons about death than taxes because of the two I find death less depressing. If neither subject appeals to you, then perhaps this site would be more to your liking. Otherwise scroll on down. Click the images for a larger view.

Let's get things started with TAXES:

Man, those tax guys give me the willies! 

And now DEATH:

See? Doesn't Death come across as more likable? 

Well, that does it for today. For more death related cartoon fun check out my listing at CartoonStock

Later, people!